Desperate Housewives Episode 2.21 I Know Things Now

Lynette tells Tom that Ed wants to fire him, so he better not give him a reason. But Ed hires a forensic accountant to go over Tom's business expenses, looking for cause to let him go.

Tom goes to talk to Ed but ends up punching him. Lynette confronts Ed for driving Tom to do it and he shows her one of Tom's expense reports that includes a side trip to Atlantic City and tickets for two to a show and flowers. When Tom comes to clear out his desk, he tells Lynette it's for the best. And she asks if there's anything else he wants to tell her and he says "No."

Gaby's lost Lily, now she faces losing Xiao Mei too, since immigration wants to deport her. The only way she can stay is if she's married to an American citizen -- or pregnant with one. So Gaby and Carlos suggest that Xiao Mei become their surrogate mother. But she's a virgin and she doesn't want to be "ruined" for a future husband. Gaby says she's being silly and that if she wants to land a rich husband, they prefer someone with experience. Xiao Mei is now on board, but she's misunderstood -- she gets into bed naked and waits for Carlos to join her! Gaby quickly sets her straight.

Mike finds the P.I. Edie hired to spy on Susan in the bushes outside her house and punches him out. He calls Susan over and plays the incriminating audiotape of Susan telling Karl that the sex last week was "the best of her life." She tries to explain, and to insist that sex with Mike was the best, but he throws her out.

The only way that Susan can stop Edie from hearing the tape is if she buys off the P.I., but she's broke. So she decides the best thing is to break the news to Edie herself. She writes an apology and mails it.

Then Mike tells her he paid off the P.I. and Susan realizes he still cares about her. But she has to get that letter back! So she asks the mailman in for iced tea. After several glasses, she invites him to use the bathroom, the one upstairs so she can retrieve the undelivered letter. She hides it with her mail that's sitting out on the table. Meanwhile, he's on her bed, waiting for her in his underwear! Luckily, just then Julie comes home, so she tells him to get dressed. But not before Julie goes through the mail, finds the letter for Edie, and sticks it back in the mailbag.

Edie gets the letter and, seeing that Susan's gone over to Mike's to thank him for helping her out, she sets Susan's house on fire.

Betty plans to euthanize Caleb out in the middle of nowhere, until he says he hopes Matthew isn't mad at him, since he told Caleb to kiss Danielle. Betty brings him home. And then she locks Matthew in the basement.

Bree invites Peter over dinner and, although Danielle and Andrew know they met in AA, she asks him not to mention that he's a sex addict. But Andrew's been listening in on their phone conversation, and he tells Danielle he's got a brilliant way for her to get back at Bree for not letting her see Matthew anymore. At dinner, Danielle puts her hand on Peter's knee, and then on his crotch. Peter abruptly leaves, claiming he's needed elsewhere.

Peter comes by the next day to drop off a college brochure for Andrew, since he's interested in attending the school Peter went to. Andrew seizes his opening for the ultimate revenge on Bree when he realizes that Peter's sex addiction means he's attracted to men as well as women.

Bree arrives home, looking for Andrew since he called saying there was an emergency. And she finds him in her bed, with Peter coming out of the bathroom in his underwear. "Now we're even," Andrew smirks.

She still drives him to the college for a tour, as they'd planned, but halfway there, she pulls over and hands him a duffel bag and some money and tells him he can go anywhere he wants now. He tears up and tells her, "You know what? I win. The day I told you I was gay, I knew by the look in your eyes that one day you'd stop loving me. And I was right."

"Good for you," she says, and drives away, crying.