The 'We R Who We R' singer recalls having a 'crazy psychedelic spiritual experience in the midst of the anxiety' and thinking she suffered from 'a psychotic break.'
- May 26, 2023
AceShowbiz - Ke$ha once confused intense anxiety with a "psychotic break." The 36-year-old star - who has openly talked about her mental health struggles - admitted she has turned to "spirituality" to help her heal after having to deal with a "crazy" experience.
"I went through this crazy psychedelic spiritual experience in the midst of the anxiety… it was pure anxiety. My brain felt like... I thought maybe it was the process of having a psychotic break or something. But then once I just started leaning into it, I was like, 'Well, it's happening, so what am I going to do about it?' " she said to Apple Music's Zane Lowe.
The "Tik Tok" hitmaker revealed she wrote new track "Eat the Acid" - which features on her new album "Gag Order" - about the experience. She added, "I had this full psychedelic kind of trip sober, and that's what 'Eat the Acid' is written about."
Besides writing, Kesha took comfort in a "rabbit hole" of spirituality and "the paranormal." She said, "But after that I just really started leaning into… I'm a triple Pisces, I love weird, unexplainable, spiritual, supernatural stuff."
"So after this happened to me, I went down a total - it's my rabbit hole I'm currently in, is just the paranormal and also different spirituality, different things people believe in. I'm just trying to read about it because I feel like we're all talking about a similar thing."
Kesha - who sued music producer Lukasz Gottwald in 2014 in a bid to get out of her recording contracts after accusing him of sexual assault and battery, while he subsequently filed a countersuit for defamation which will go to trial in July - recently admitted that working on the new album was an emotional experience.
She told The Guardian newspaper, "I would walk in every day and for approximately two hours I would cry and he would just create space. He never once asked me to stop crying, or to get it together. It just took me a minute to put a voice to these really unpleasant, embarrassing emotions. I don't want to be seen as weak, or f***** up, or unhappy, because overall in my life … I have all the emotions."
