The plus-size model reveals that she is filled with 'tremendous gratitude' now after going through a 'long, confusing and hard' journey throughout her marriage.
- Feb 2, 2021
AceShowbiz - Tess Holliday can now breathe a little easier. Getting candid about the "unhealthy, toxic" relationship she had with Nick Holliday, the plus-size model spilled that she felt "so free" after being able to leave her estranged husband.
On Sunday, January 31, the 35-year-old took to Twitter to express her relief. "I feel so free now," she simply tweeted. Beforehand, she shared a lengthy statement on both Twitter and Instagram about her "abusive" marriage.
"Coming out of such an abusive, unhealthy, toxic marriage and finding love through my friendships and more importantly myself has been such a freeing experience," she began her story. "I'm choosing to share all of this with y'all because I know so many people are going through similar things."
"I can't say that it's as easy as leaving, because for some, they don't get that choice, it's stolen from them. Not everyone gets to walk away (claw my way out in my case) and feel the sun kissing their skin, and I hold space for those that we have lost to intimate partner violence," she added. "If you are in this situation, you are so loved and your feelings are valid, even if you can't see that right now. This isn't your fault."
Tess went on to note, "Healing is so much harder than I imagined. Abuse is so subtle sometimes that it bleeds into our lives slowly, disguising itself as love, until before you know it … you're covered in blood … unsure of how you got to that place." She continued, "It doesn't matter how 'powerful' you are. It doesn't matter if you think 'it will ever happen to me.' It happens."
"It happened to me. I watched my career, my friends, my finances, literally everything vanish and I couldn't stop until it was almost too late," Tess, who wed Nick in 2015, further explained. "It was humbling, gut wrenching and honestly, a little embarrassing (still dealing with that part)."
Tess claimed that she has tried her best to be "transparent" and reminded her fans that what she showed online did not always match with the reality. "How can I be a beacon for a loving yourself when at home my life looked a lot different than what was shared online?" she asked. "I always tried to be as transparent as I could, but unless you've ever been in my situation, no one can really say for sure what they would do."
Despite going through a "long, confusing and hard" journey throughout her marriage, Tess divulged that she is now filled with "tremendous gratitude." She concluded, "I still don't recognize myself in the mirror most days. But I'm happy, I'm safe and yea I'm a hell of a lot fatter (making peace with this part too) but I'm still standing. Fear doesn't take up space in my home anymore, it's been replaced with gratitude. Tremendous gratitude."
