Despite their split, the TLC star reveals that her feelings for her '90 Day Fiance' co-star doesn't change much, admitting in her recent Instagram post, 'To this day I still hurt. I still love him.'
- Dec 30, 2019
AceShowbiz - It seems like Ashley Martson hasn't been able to fully accept her split from ex-husband and "90 Day Fiance" co-star Jay Smith. The reality star recently took to her Instagram account to pour out her feelings in addition to posting a picture of her crying because of her divorce from Smith.
"This is as raw and real as I can be. I'm fighting the tears just typing this. This year has been tough," she wrote in the caption as the picture featured her sporting a ruined mascara. "This photo was taken accidentally the night of my birthday party in New York City. We had just split and I filed for divorce for the second time."
Ashley then recalled being civil with Jay at her birthday bash, though she couldn't help but get emotional as soon as she "walked out the door and got in the Uber with @ritzy_rina." She explained, "The tears came pouring out. It was the moment I knew... I knew I failed. I failed my marriage, myself, my children."
The TV star, however, said that she didn't blame Jay for how things came down between them. "I just want men and women to both know it’s okay to not be okay. It's okay to cry it out. It's okay to not be strong all the time. It's okay to fail. Whats not okay is to let it destroy you," so she shared.
Despite their split, Ashley revealed that her feelings for Jay didn't change much. "To this day I still hurt. I still love him," she said. "I just have come to terms with the fact it's over and I'm gonna be okay."
Ending his message, Ashley wanted her followers to know that "time truly does heal wounds," while saying that there will be Ashley and Jay no more. "I'm leaving this post with the final time I speak on us or our marriage. It's about to be a new year and I'm ready to start a new chapter and not look back." she said.
Ashley and Jay called it quits after Ashley filed for divorce from Jay for the second time in April. She also sought a protection from abuse order against him and he was later arrested in July. Ashley, however, dropped the divorce before announcing their split once again in October after it was revealed that Jay impregnated another woman.
